I'll be coming for your love anyway.

Remember how I questioned feeling old because I was so psyched about getting new appliances? Like I was Little Betty Home-Maker? Well...you should have seen me yesterday when we went to Target together and picked out curtains, hung the curtains, and admired the curtains!!!Psyched...and elderly. But hey, if we're both pumped about said curtains and it made us both happy for a moment in time, I don't care how old I felt. We're being hermits. We're nesting. We're building a life together...and that life included picking out curtains. I bet the neighbors are thrilled!! *blush*

I finished my first painting...an improved version of the chick eating her own stomach. It's at the gallery waiting for the Halloween Spooktacular to open. Todd and I both agreed that it was kind of sad to look at the easel and have it be empty. Sigh. It may not have been my BEST painting but it certainly wasn't my worst. And most importantly, it made me laugh. It turned out pretty much how I imagined it would and I worked very hard. Might have put a little too much pressure on myself but because I did, I accomplished what I set out to do. I'm going to give myself a high five...no matter how awkward that might look.

In other artsy news, Phoebe, my biggest supporter and chill companion, sponsored me to paint a Plushform for some benefit they're doing at Shopparoni (50% of profits go to some children's charity...I know it has "ninjas" in the title so what could be cooler?). I am so super psyched. It was such a sweet thing for her to do. Not sure exactly what I'm going to do with my Plushform. My mind is all about skunks these days (oh armpit skunk...with all the overtime Im clocking, you're destined to be mine...after the bills are paid, of course). We'll see, I guess. It's just another awesome thing for me to do while being a hermit/nesting. I'm getting my art on, Todd's doing home improvements. Love it. Hardcore.

Made my first lasagna yesterday. Total hit. NESTING!

So that's pretty much all I had to jaw about. Good, solid weekend. Celebrated Tom and Carol's 14th wedding anniversary on Friday by drinking beer out of a plastic boot and eating killer bar food. Hit a family function (at Winking Lizard...boss) on Saturday, watched a really MESSED UP movie that I didn't want to watch (I almost pouted) and ended up liking. Got up early on Sunday and accomplished SO MUCH (painting, cleaning, laundry, dishes, shopping)! Feels good deep down in my core...especially when I got 2 new Moofia!! Watched cartoons and crashed. THE END.

Enjoy your Monday. If that's even possible.

Someone to die for you and more.

I've been asking everyone if they have their periods. Today rots.

I'm crabby. I'm fussy. I'm irritable. Everything about me, inside-n-out, is in knots. Fed up, fucked off, what have you. I didn't sleep well last night or the night before and at this very second, I'm at the end of my rope and might tie it in a knot and slip it over my head. I hate today and I have far too much to do to be exhausted and surly and amped, OH MY! And this beautiful mood I'm in seems to be the norm for people today. Awesome. A world full of suck-o.

I wish I had a new Moofia. Or a smorkin' something-or-other. Rad.

As soon as I clock out...get ready for the ramble...I have to ditch this place, truck to Anna Banana's to get skunkier and chill with my girlfriend, Phoene Jeans, rush home, paint like a mothertruckin' maniac, and TRY to stay awake for the (2 hour) season premier of Gray's Anatomy, only to have to catch some ZZZZZZs in order to haul ass in for some overtime. I'm exhausted all ready and that's really burning my toast. Exhaustion iced with psychotic business does NOT make for a tasty treat.

Y entonces mañana...

The madness starts all over again, still built on an ever-growing foundation of exhaustion. Put in some overtime so we can have luxuries like cable and ice-cream, rush to the homestead (after a pit stop for the weekly anniversary card), paint like a mothertruckin' maniac BEFORE I have to head out for a cozy little event. I'll probably fall asleep in my chicken fingers and big beers. Don't let me drown.

After a quick and painless family functiony thing-a-majig, I can crash. I am looking forward to that crash like nobody's business and I plan to crash Dale Earnhardt-style. Consider me dead to the world. God, that sounds so good right now that I'm on the verge of a vag-quake! Pajamas, pillows, mindless entertainment that allows me to turn off my brain until the race (or maybe football?) on Sunday.

Maybe none of this seems like THAT big of a deal but along with all the other things driving me crazy-bananas (which I don't feel like sharing)...I'm worked over from head to toe. I'm stressing about my painting. I'm stressing about running all over like a chicken with my heart cut off. I'm stressing about reaching my limit with a lot of things. I don't really feel like emploding this week.

I don't feel like having heartburn either.

I just need a break from dealing with bullshit. Yesterday Todd mentioned how nice it would be to have a hotel room (we're both big fans) with a hot tub/whirlpool and to just reeeeeeeelax. But who can afford that right now? I said all we can afford is out "nest" at home since it's free...and there's no hot tub/whirlpool in our nest. The sweet suggestions only temporarily ease the stress of running on go. I want to just quit on everything and everyone...but I have to "give up on giving up"...even if some peopel around me gave up long ago. I feel like Atlas.

I'm taking a temporary dive. Me and my scummy mouth.

Hope my boyfriend don't mind it.

I was all set to have "Bruises" by Chairlift be my new jam. I am sad to say that I am embarrassed I bought it off I-tunes. I thought it had such potential when I heard it on the Ipod commercial. It was through those little snipets that I fell in love with "Flathead" by The Fratellis and "1, 2, 3, 4" by Feist. Both gems. But not this torture device. It's so sugary-sweet and lovely and I must erase it from my brain, even if that involves a blowtorch or some sort of drilling mechanism. Heavy duty sand paper or polishing stones?

My new jam is "I Kissed a Girl" by Katy Perry.

I downloaded it this morning...never heard the tune before but heard the hype all summer. Summer's over. Time for me to catch up. So I played it. Then I played it again. And again. And again! And now it's playing in my brain. I mean, it's not the most lyrically stunning song I've ever heard...but it's a total jam! It made me want to dance like a m-m-m-maniac. But it probably wouldn't have been very safe for me to do that behind the wheel. Listening to "I Kissed a Girl" was alot like when I heard "Since You've Been Gone" for the first time. Stunning. I expecting it to be so bubblegum and silly. But with her deep voice and the overall thumping...total jam.

Dating Phoebe for a bit after work. Be jealous.

So come at me with mouth open wide.

I got up on the wrong side of the bed, without a doubt.

I'm in an evil, nasty, creepy, rotten, little mood that is just bubbling up and pulsating and festering and throbbing and whatever else it can do that would be deemed repulsive. It started last night and hung on mercilessly. Didn't have such a rockin' good work day which was irritating so I was looking forward to some promised and anticiapted relaxing shower time which would have been just DREAMY. Then stupid life stepped in.

I got stung by a BEE! For the first time!!!

I was trucking along, glad to be heading home to a boyfriend (who had done all sorts of sweet boyfriend things at our digs) and felt this drilling in my arm. I thought maybe a steel shaving weaseled it's way into my hoodie. NO SUCH LUCK! That little honey sucked was already on it's way to Deadsville and I was wounded. I squashed it while driving recklessly and immediately starting flipping. It wasn't as bad as I had always imagined a bee-sting, but it was still BAD! And I complained. A lot. Boo.

Something sweet happened via text message. My heart smiled.

AND THEN IT FROWNED! Pffffffffft! Regardless.

So the main squeeze and I trucked to my nephew's for a little Mustang repair and I ended up getting my feeling squashed like a rotten tomato, which I was not expecting. Not by my fella. Not by my nephew. No details...just know my feelings are now mushy tomatos on the sidewalk! Todd held my hand the whole ride and just let me stew and hurt quietly. He asked me if I wanted to snuggle when we got home, knowing that would ease my bumps-n-bruises. Appreciated, to say the very least. But I slept like utter GARBAGE. So now...

...I'm in an evil, nasty, creepy, rotten, little mood!

I am officially not a fan of Mondays. Or of "feelings". OR BEES! I'm going to cook dinner for Todd to make up for our not getting relaxing shower time due to my surly mood. It will at least make me feel a little bit better if I can do something nice for him. And anything that will make me feel a little bit better is way welcome in my book. Look, I know this will all passed. So my feelings got hurt. Big deal. And there are things to look forward to this week...a yummy lunch, playing housewife, chill time with Phee-Bizzle, PFG practice, a skunk stripe appointment, an anniversary celebration...there are things to be psyched about. I'm just not psyched right NOW.

And I shall plan my revenge against the Cleveland bees.

Make everyone wonder what's going on.

September is almost over? Time BOOKS!

My new favorite thing on this planet is to be in what Todd calls "a nest". Directions: we take all the back cushions off the couch, bring our comforter and pillows downstairs, and get in serious snuggle-mode while watching a movie. He called it "our nuptial nest" last night as we watched 20 minutes of "Cecil B. Demented" and 20 minutes of "Elvira: Mistress Of the Dark". It may sound sappy and not that inventive, but it was a gnarly way to tie up a pretty gnarly weekend. Gnarly. I should have used "rad".

Before I recap the havoc, let me tell you that when my sleeve is done (alllllllllmost), I am going to get a gassy skunk tattooed in my armpit. It's getting rave reviews from the people cool enough to matter and I truly believe it will be my crowning jewel. Stick around!

I'm having the hardest time remembering what we did on Friday because I am mentally-n-physically beat. I'm pretty sure we sat around and shot the breeze while I painted canvas backgrounds...6 are done and ready to be rocked! Oh wait...it's all coming back to me! And it's X-RATED! My sexy new appliances came! Am I old for being psyched? I don't care. We went to da sto' and filled the new fridge/freezer up with goodies and were so super psyched that we just had to rip our clothes off right there in the kitchen! Hubba hubba! Yeah...Friday was good stuff.

I was laying on the couch like a spazz on Saturday and Todd said, "Do you want to paint?". I can't tell you how much it means to me to FINALLY have a dude in my life that supports my painting and tried to beinvolved! *purr* We trucked to the store and he bought me more canvases (and a groom rubber duckie cause my bride was lonely)...then I painted backgrounds as he painted the anchor table he had been obsessing over while we jammed some tunes. Everything felt jusssssst right for a moment. Goldilocks would have been pleased.

Saturday night we hit Roc Bar to see Miss Firecracker One Woman Band and Cult of the Psychic Fetus. Bad ass. They played all my favorite jams and I rocked out...even after a homosexual couple decided I looked like a more bad-ass (am I overusing that?), saucy, young, tattooed, Democratic version of Sarah Palin. Whatever. I don't see it. But as Carol would say (in an adorable squeaky voice), "I can see Russia from my house!"

Interjection: I hate that stupid "little pink houses" songs by John Cougar Melloncamp. It should just be destroyed. It is the song I dread hearing most throughout my work day. Vom. Now back to my babble.

Sunday was the best day of my weekend, which is rarely true since Becky moved away.

Speaking of Becky, Johnny asked me when we were going to roadtrip to C-Bus to see you. We have a list of songs we're going to jam the whole way there. We miss you painfully. Now back to Sunday.

We woke up early and...well...*blush*. Then we woke up AGAIN perty late and really had to rally. I love that term, "rally". Aiden came over, I cooked homemade veggie soup, we watched the race, Aiden played with a group of neighborhood kids, we vegged out and watched football, I cooked chicken paprikash and my first time was a decent success. I felt like a mini-family when the neighbor kids came knocking on the door asking if Aiden could come back out. It was a good day. It ended with "a nest".

Oh, today? Today was Katie's first day back at The Coast. Every time she was in my line of sight, giddiness took over. I'm so pumped she's back where she belongs, sporting brightly colored red-n-purple hair. I was informed that now that she and her 'do are back, I better step it up. And I'll do just that by getting my forehead tattooed. Oh SNAP!

I'm in a good mood today. Don't wreck it.

You begin to wonder why you came.

I want to talk/blog/whatever. I can feel words-n-thoughts trying to come out. I'm having a hard time gathering it all up and wrapping my brain around what I want to talk about. Confusing? I have a lot on my mind and didn't get a lot of sleep last night, to be honest. And when I did sleep, I did not have the most comforting dreams. And there were a boatload. Dream after dream after dream during my broken sleep. I'm exhausted. I'm not going to get into what's bugging me to the point of sleeplessness. I just wrote the longest e-mail in the history of e-mails regarding it. So...it's sort of out of my system. Today is just a weird day.

I like my hands. They're small and slender but have big plans.

Pussyfoot Girls were asked to be on the bill for a pretty rad show in October and I'm super-psyched. Put this on your calendar. Mark it in blood. The Pussyfoot Girls, Bob's Country Bunker, Whiskey Daredevils, Legendary Hucklebucks AND MORE! If that doesn't sound like a recipe for fun, I don't know what does. We have a lot of work to do. We need new songs and we need to tighten up. This is our only chance to have a Halloween/October show since The Sac is sort of on hiatus. We hope to be back to doing shows soon but for now...PFG need to spread the joy to other venues and cities. And we're spreading our joy, amoung other things, at Cedar's in Youngstown on October 24th. You've be warned.

Unholy and dirty words I gathered to me.

Sick of reading about painting? Your wrists need slit. Scram.

I'm submitting a painting...to the gallery I'm hoping to get a show at...for their Halloween exhibition. I'm totally pumped AND super-psyched so you just KNOW I'm foaming at the mouth with excitement. I got in touch yesterday and he said there was still room for a submission. So yours truly is IN! Now hold your horses...I have to deliver it to the gallery NO LATER than the 27th. That doesn't give me a lot of time but I am focused and determined. I feel good about it. I feel just like I would if...nevermind. Gutter mouth. Filthy brain.

Todd wants to help somehow with the potential gallery show collection. He said he wants to be involved with my painting "to an extent of course". I think that it incredibly cool...especially since my co-stars in my 3 previous big relationships didn't want to be involved in pretty much any aspect of my life. Not having support can be practically heart breaking. But I've got it. And that's damn cool.

I want "HIGH FIVE" on my knuckles. I should just do it.

So, in my quest to take on all the positive aspects of Phoebe's being, I'm all abotu the blind box toys. I'm collecting these things called Moofia now which are adorable little milks...rice, soy, chocolate, strawberry, half-n-half...I'm in love. I'm trying not to let my obsession get too out of hand...maybe just pick one up when I'm at the comic book shop with Phee. I was NOT going to start looking at toys on line. I WASN'T! Then I did. And when I thought a smoking rabbit (I refuse to call it a smorkin' labbit or whatever) riding a slug was the most amazing thing ever, I was wrong. A SMOKING RABBIT WEARING SOME SORT OF "CLASH OF THE TITANS" HELMET RIDING A SLUG IS THE MOST AMAZING THING EVER. Gotta have it. WILL have it. Damn it! I just found a mini-smokig rabbit that's customized to look like a shark. Whadda buncha bullshit.

Recent text from my neph: "Gotta have boats and hoes". So true.

I wish I wasn't do exhausted to the point where I feel like I'm asleep with my eyes open today. I wish that my lunch was sitting a little more still in my tummy right now. I wish I didn't equate the term "low life" with the term "scum bag". I wish my background was done so I could get right to the meat of my painting. I wish Hugh Hefner would drop Kendra and marry Holly (rumor is Kendra will be out soon...thank sweet Zombie Jesus). I wish I had a smoking rabbit wearing a "Clash of the Titans" helmet and riding a slug. I wish good people in my life would stop getting the shaft. I wish "What a Fool Believes" was not on the radio anymore. I wish it was 5:45p tomorrow so Phoebe and I could slam some beers. I wish I could get what I needed without screaming for it all the time. I wish the Pushing Daisies season one box set would appear on my steps so I wouldn't have to go get it. I wish I was done typing because machine gun fingers are exhausting.

ONE DOWN!

Art is why I get up in the morning.

I used Ani DiFranco as my song quote? That leaves a very bitter taste in my mouth. Something closely resembling bile. Or murder. Yes, my mouth tastes like murder from using that quote. How did I ever like her and/or respect her a musician? I did think she was utterly adorable for a cool minute. Regardless. Ick. And the quote is just so...stated. I'm regretting my choice. However, I am not changing it since I blathered this entire paragraph. What a sham.

There was a PFG show Friday. That's all I got there.

I did buy the best shoes I've ever owned Friday.

Saturday was like a major vagina injection. I'm not sure what that means. What I mean to say is that I spent a lot of time with someone jam-packed with estrogen...Phee-Bizzle...and we did girly stuff...practiced making-out and read Teen Beat. OR...we actually went to The Melting Pot and had expensive cocktails before 1:00pm. Then we went to Crate & Barrel where I ALWAYS announce how clumsy I am since EVERYTHING is breakable, bought a silver skeleton hand at Z Gallerie, hit Shoparooni where I bought a stuffed moustache WITH IT'S OWN MOUSTACHE, and loaded up on Halloween goodness at Target. It was a fun, exhausting, and expensive day. My wallet weeps.

There was also college football ad the best snuggle of my life.

Sunday was productive. I hope all Sundays are as productive.

Guess what?

I AM PAINTING AGAIN! Phee-Bizzle is possibly helping me get an art show sometime next year at some gallery she knows. I've been blathering on about this on My Space and to Carol so I'm sort of all blathered out. Know that I am totally super-psyched about it...if it happens. She gave me the jolt I need to start painting again and painting is WHAT I LOVE! I needed something in my life that I could feel good about and I can feel good about this. I felt alive buying supplies for my first piece. I felt loved when Todd bought me an artist rubber duckie, insisting I keep it at my station, and called me Hot Rod Picasso. My goal is 25-30 AWESOME pieces. Nothing mediocre will be acceptable in my eyes. Having an art show and selling one painting is a dream of mine. I want to finish this whole thing feeling really proud of myself. I am determined to feel accomplished.

I can not WAIT to get my hands dirty.

Hypnotized by those snake-slit eyes!

My 19 year old nephew called me "Aunt Ci-Ci" today. Chuckle.

I'm sure Phee-Bizzle will punch me directly in the vag for saying this, but it sure is swell when her lovin' man is out of town! Not swell for her, of course, because she misses him painfully, like a phantom limb and I know what that's like. Todd and I have only spent 7 nights apart in our entire relationship and were both ready to chew through our pillows and/or wrists! But this isn't about what freaks we are about one another. It's about how Phoebe is a tour widow and I'm reaping the benefits like the world's most lazy theif!!

Last night I was lucky enough to swill INCREDIBLY cheap beer and shoot the breeze with the broad (*sidenote - my bad ass boyfriend sent HER a text message that said "Give my Lacey Cakes a kiss for me". Yeah, he rules and you're jealous). Tonight she's accompanying me to film a shotgun wedding skit for the "Jesus County Fair" variety show that D.A.B. is filming. I am playing pregnant bride, Felma Lou Spurwinkle. You know what this means? It's wig time! This is not about my wig fetish though. It's about Phoebe being awesome company for the hike to The 'Ville. Saturday, when the boys are at the baseball game, she at I are hitting the zoo like two fashionable socialites. The day continues with a flask and a discount screening of "Sex and The City". And Sunday brunch? Yeah. I'm a Pheebaholic this week. It's my duty to keep her brain and her date book occupied. Her vag? That's her business.

"Baby, It's You" by The Beatles is a sexy song. Recognize.

PFG have our first show without Queen La Tata tomorrow night. But it's almost like we're weening off heroin because she'll BE there but as Miss Firecracker One-Woman Band! And she's graciously agreed to introduce us which is good. We're mighty shy for 3 chatty gals in our underpants. I'm a little nervous...Queen La Tata always helped me squash my stage fright and go balls out. At least her adorable face will be in the crowd, cheering us on, specifically me because I'm selfish and hoarding her affection and support. 2 sets...that's a lot of Pussy...foot Girls. And last night's practice was a touch rocky for various reasons. But I'm always pleasantly surprised at our shows so I'll just keep my chin up. Come out to At Witz End and slug some PBRs with the Pussyfoot Girls.

That's what I've got. What have YOU got?

There's times that I wonder if you remember.

Before I start spewing love and blood all over your laps and/or faces and into your eyeballs and/or ears (if someone is reading this to you like a bedtime story)...and believe me, this is going to be nothing but gushing about how in lurve I am (with a little triple X action thrown in) so if you're a major hater, turn back now...I have to say the following to one of the hottest bitches in Cleveland:

ROLLER SKATING DOUBLE DATING?!? I'm in.

Also, that should be our band's first album.

Also, we should start a band and make an album.

Now back to the cartoon hearts and bubbles and "XOXO" and romancin' your pants off. Man, you're going to wish I was still rollilng around in a shit-filled pool of self-pity and misery once you're done reading. I'm a happy clam and my clam is happy, too, and I insist on sharing it with the whole flipping world like some people would their Herpes. That really isn't aimed at anyone specific. Herpes is my go-to STD. Regardless...I even got the A-OK to spill the sticky-sweet details from the man of the house, who is not a blog fan. But he'll support this...cause it gives him a big, fat, pat on the back for being an awesome boyfriend! A literary smack on his ass, if you will. So here comes the MOOSH!

Monday sucked, as Monday's tend to do, especially when it's your first day back to work after surgery. I'm just going to say that things did not go well and I was dragging my corpse around my place of employment...I wasn't ready to go back to work. My body wasn't ready. It was just ready to hurt and cry. I did a lot of complaining to the boyfriend, not expecting what I got when I came home. He was waiting for me at the door, all smiley and adorable. We laid down on the couch and shot the breeze...he was really happy to see me, which microwaved my heart. He told me he had a little evening planned for us but we had to wait until it got dark...hmmmmm. We cracked a few cold ones (incredibly stupid since I KNEW I was dehydrated to the MAX) and stood in the kitchen, talk-talk-talking. "Learn To Love" was on today's date on the calendar. "I Heart My Cupcake" was on the dry-erase board. He told me what his INITIAL plan was for our evening...which takes a little back-trackin':

Saturday we were SUPPOSED to go see Nine Pound Hammer. We didn't. Well, we WENT to The Jigsaw but we didn't see them. And it was the fault of one of us...the one that isn't ME! It caused a fairly glorious spat. I think couples need to have them from time to time...it sometimes helps you set your priorities. Regardless...his initial plan was to get Nine Pound Hammer CDs and 24oz. PBR cans so we could stand around the living room, pretending we were at the show. Him just TELLING ME THAT was uber-romantic (I was not shocked that he couldn't find Nine Pound Hammer CDs...though if he had looked in my collection...). He recognized that he screwed up. That's all I needed.

But that's not all I got! Moving on...to Mooshville...

We watched Family Guy, as we like to do, and held hands, which I like to do. It's my "go-to" comfort mechanism. I felt like we had just started dating...we were all goofy about each other. So finally...Todd decides it's dark enough for "our little evening". I go upstairs and there are candles all over the bathroom...even in the shower. I'm not a super girly-girl but it was dang perty! So we hope in the shower..no XXX yet...and I just washed the stress of my day away. We were totally in love and awesome and I forgot why it had been such a bad day. He were beyond happy...he told me he could promise me a lifetime of "this" and I accepted. We may have rough patches but overall, he knows how to take my pain away. Oh! Did I mention the part where he brought 2 beers INTO the shower??? My face ached from smiling and laughing so much.

Then the shower was over. Frown.

So we go into the Tomb Room which is pitch black and what do I hear? Crack! Crack! Crack! All sorts of blue glow sticks illuminating the room!! If you really know me, you know that my heart throbs for things that glow...at Cedar Point, I always had to have one million glow necklaces and I would try to preserve them in the freezer as long as I could. So a mammoth smile was PLASTERED across my face! And the treats kept coming...he bought me a Hot Wheel (we collect), we bought mini-Snickers (which I orgasm for), and he bought me a card shaped like an eyeball, telling me he was sorry for upsetting me over the weekend. I asked him why he was doing all of this...hesaid he screwed things up and upset me and loves me and this is what he should be doing. Or something like that. I fell in love all over again.

Insert XXX here.

So that's the story of why my boyfriend is so much better that your boyfriend. I didn't need a whole day full of romancin' and pampering but I would never turn it down from him. He was so genuinely excited to do everything he did...and I was so genuinely excited BY everything he did. I changed what my favorite part of the evening was every 5 seconds. I think it truthfully might have been when he said if he found a magic lamp, he would use his wishes to undo specific things that hurt my heart...so I think I can finally forgive him. He loves me. We're going to be a family.

THE MOOSH IS OVER! VOMIT AT WILL!

In other news...PFG...2 sets...At Witz End...Friday.

You can dry your eyes.

After a short...but memorable...hiatus, your favorite program is back on the air! So many updates on your favorite characters, you will no doubt drench your drawers while urinating with delight! Or you will just be bored to tears and/or death in which case...go ahead and drop dead already! Or just stop reading if you want to preserve your life and the way you live it. Rambling? Yeah...you know you missed it, my babies.

Where the fuck to start? How about my trip?!?

For starters, it rocked my knee-high socks right off my stems and there are pictures to prove it (coming soon). And they are officially my favorite pictures ever taken EVER. We look so...happy. Genuinely happy. And we look so bananas in love. We've already framed a bunch and every time I look at them, my heart feels warm. I'm not going to give you the play-by-play on everything we did at any given moment during the weekend because it will only mean anything to us. But we did a lot and we had a blast. It was worth every penny!!! I could get real sappy...I'll swallow that down. I would like to apologize to Erin for missing yet another opportunity to bask in the glory that is her beauty...I had every intention of going to the show...until the weekend caught up with me and I was in bed and spoony by 9:05p. Roller skating soon??? What what!?

And then there's this whole "emergency room" business.

Ugh.

Once again, I'm going to hold back on the play-by-play. It's personal. I have to be selective about what I choose to share with the world. I can say this...there was a lot of blood. A LOT. More than I've ever seen up close and personal. And no, I didn't slit my wrists or anything, my GOD. I'm being cryptic because it's personal and those who need to know DO. I just mentioned the blood because it's haunting me still!!! It was a traumatic and humiliating experience. But I think it brought Todd and I a smidge closer. He was an excellent support system and kept my head screwed on when I couldn't do it alone. It was so comforting to hear him say all these sweet things before I went into surgery (I suggested he tell me everything he ever wanted to in case I died) and to see his smiling face when I came out. He saw a lot of things I'm sure he didn't want to see and put up with me squeezing his hand mighty tight a few times. He was a trooper. I am a very lucky girl and I KNOW I couldn't have gotten through it all without him.

And that pretty much brings us to now. I know this wasn't very light-hearted and ha-larious like I'vetried to be recently. But honestly...I lost enough blood to feed 3 adult male vampires so I'm having trouble focusing. So...I had a fun trip that weekend and I survived, which I'm sure disappoints many of you but THRILLS others, this past week. Now I just take one day at a time and put one foot in front of the other until I'm fully recovered. Thanks to everyone who senf friendly words and cheer up messages and what not. I'm lucky to have such bad ass people in my life and I hope I can be there for you in return some day.

Hopefully you're not bleeding to death like I was, though.