Wednesday, April 27, 2011

I roam from town to town. I go through life without a care.

Our New York adventure was beyond what I could have possibly imagined. I have been there before but never did the touristy thing, never saw the sights. And I was never with this awesome a group of people: John Jackson, Sharon D., and my hubby. I now officially <3 NY. I want to die in Central Park...but not Law and Order: SVU style.

We left at 2:00am with yours truly behind the wheel. Time seemed to fly by (with the help of 250 jams of the 80s) and before you knew it, it was morning in the financial district of NYC and we were dropping our bags at the Downtown Marriott.

We walked to Battery Park and had an NY hot dog while checking out the Statue of Liberty. The weather was a little chilly but nice for a day of hardcore walking around. We checked out Wall St. and the cemetery at Trinity Church. That church blew my mind and for a good portion of the trip was my favorite thing. Utterly beautiful. Stopped at the seaport and had lunch at the NY Merchant Cafe and then went to our room for a cat nap in the most comfy beds on the planet. But on the way back to our hotel, we stopped at Ground Zero which was around the corner. It was really incredible...heartbreaking and mind blowing.

Post-nap we went to Times Square. The plan was to go to MoMA but the line was around the corner (damn art lovers) so we changed gears and wandered through Rockefeller Center then went to Madame Tussaud's Wax Museum. The Lady Gaga statue was my favorite, of course, but I wish it would've been a little less crowded. We hit the subway (I was a pro by the time we left) and grabbed a slice on the chilly patio at some pizza joint on Bleeker St. in the Village. Does that need to be capitalized? Make a note next time you're in NYC...that particular pizza place serves Presidente.

A lot was crammed into the first day. I was proud of myself AND Spencer for doing as much as we did.


First thing on this verrrrry rainy day, we headed back to Times Square where I had left my heart the previous evening and grabbed some coffee (peppermint hot chocolate for me and the monster) to warm up. There's a booth in the square that sells same-day discount tickets for Broadway shows. Lo and behold, they had tickets for the matinee showing of the Addams Family musical for 50% off! That had Todd and me written all over it, and it was Sharon's first musical.

To kill time, we walked to Central Park and stopped in at the Jekyll and Hyde Club for a drink ($3.25 for a soda...I'm still on fire about it). That was one of the major places on my list that I wanted to see and it was a BUST. The more I think about that mess, the happier I am that we didn't eat dinner there as planned. Moving on, we waltzed with our umbrellas around the horse and carriages at Central Park where we saw obvious SVU "raping spots" and I educated Sharon on roofies. Then we headed back to the Lunt-Fontaine theater (and passed Le Bernardain on the way!!!) to dry off and wait for the show.

The theater was beautiful (I'm glad I wore a hat, it made me feel more New York) and somehow we ended up with amazing 11th row seats! It felt very romantic somehow. And the show was very charming, though I would've paid to punch the lisping kid that played Pugsley. PUNCH! When we exited the theater, the rain had stopped and we headed back to the Village for lunch at Jack's French Bistro and a walk through Washington Square Park. Lots of cute pups and adventurous squirrels. A drink at the Slaughtered Lamb Pub and Jekyll and Hyde's Bar and Grill (FAR superior to the club, though they sure do push the shots) and then we were back at the hotel, resting our tired bones. Another A+ day.

We woke up to a BEAUTIFUL day, warm and sunny - heavenly, and had breakfast (banana split pancakes) at a local deli. Sharon parted ways with us to spend time with her step-sister who lives in NYC. It was just me and my dudes, left to our own devices, under the beautiful NYC sun. It always stuns me how a lovely day can make you feel.

First, we saw where John Lennon was shot (OK, not so lovely) and walked through Central Park where I fell in love twice, with the park and with my husband (again). He made sure that I saw (almost) everything I wanted to and that the monster and I got the attention we needed.Yeah, I LOVED the park, can't stress it enough. If I lived in NY, I would spend as much time as possible there, but maybe all non-New Yorkers think that way. If only I had a sketchbook. We walked to the MET and then back to the American History Museum. We could have spent DAYS in that museum but our feet, backs, legs would NOT allow it. We restaurant hopped until we settled on Lansky's Jewish Deli for our Easter feast. I loved Sunday. I felt like a new person...a new and VERY pregnant person! A happy person.

We went back to the hotel because 3 days of serious touring had wrecked us, physically and, for me, mentally. Sharon met up with us and after I rallied, we ended up in the hotel restaurant which was a fun time. It was a laid back and fun way to wrap up a trip that was go, go, go. I can't tell you how many times we were on the Subway but by the end of our trip, I felt like a pro. Lots of laughs that evening.

Monday morning we had our last NYC meal in the financial district, stopped in the Village one more time (picked up a 6-pack of Presidente, my favorite, to celebrate Spencer's birth when the time comes), and then checked out. Homeward bound. It was one of the first times post-trip that I wasn't dying to go home but wasn't dying to stay. Every minute of the trip was filled with something awesome and fun, and I'm sure that I have forgotten plenty of adventures we had. And I know there are plenty more adventures to be had since we didn't get to go to MoMA and missed out on Coney Island. I guess I'll just HAVE to go back in June for the Mermaid Parade!

New York was a dream. Everything I hoped for but nothing I expected. I needed to de-stress and I did. I spent time with good friends and a great husband in a city I thought I hated. And when I came home, my house was still standing and my dogs were still alive! It was the perfect long weekend and I wouldn't have done anything different. Except maybe brought a 2nd memory card. 400 pix just weren't enough!!!

But at least I have my favorite pic...father-n-son, loves of my life, in NYC.

Thursday, April 21, 2011

Spend the your pocko.

Road trip! Road trip! Road trip!

Leaving for NYC toniiiiiiight and I couldn't be slap-happier because for the last handful of days, I've been mere millimeters away from going Honey Badger on someones unsuspecting ass. And not one ass in particular. It could have been ANY ass or plural asses in a 500 foot radius. Feel lucky that you weren't near me or were spared the scrappiness of my wrath.

There's no explanation for my bad attitude but a road trip is the cure. This much I know. It's been awhile since I just jumped in the car and had an adventure. I should probably bring my Adventure Time hat for maximum adventuring. Regardless, I used to load up the car at the drop of the hat at cruuuuuuise here, there, anywhere. All you needed was a destination, car snacks, and tunes, and even the snacks were optional. The last really flat out awesome "hit all the right spots" road trip I had was to Heavy Rebel in...2007??? Hot damn.

Just thinking about Heavy Rebel 2007 improved my mood 10%.

And off topic, my head is bleeding. I should probably be more concerned.

See you when I get back to Ohio. Please try not to destroy it while I'm gone. I love it like it was my own child. I love it like I love ginormous jugs and really good cupcakes. To be safe, I'll give you the same rules I gave the person house sitting Castle Grayskull:

1. Don't kill my dogs.
2. Don't burn my house down.
3. No cops.

Have a great Easter, y'all. Hope the bunny is good to you!

Monday, April 18, 2011

I'm just a holy fool. Baby, he's so cruel.

New York City, we're coming for you, baby.

I bought some new duds, packed, got a new windshield and rear tires, new glasses (thicker, blacker, nerdier...Todd is swooning), and even splurged for some prescription sunglasses that are very Gaga-esque! I've got a play list of hundreds of jams from the 80s and a lust in my blood for a little road tripping adventure. This is going to be epic...a word I truly loathe..., I can feel it in the core of my black heart and rotten bones!

And speaking of my girlfriend, Gaga...

1. I scored tickets for Bizzle and myself and I must say, they are far better than the spendy seats I had last year. I look forward to taking in the spectacle that is Gaga again. It was worth every penny and implying suspension of disbelief. I can only hope Phoebe enjoys the insanity and nonsense as much as I do. Or I might have to find a new wife.

2. She'll be playing in the New York City area (I believe in Jersey, blech) 2 of the nights we'll be invading. There will be pain in my chest not seeing her so close to her home turf because I bet that would blow minds and splatter brains. But I can handle it. There's plenty of fun to be had without seeing perform to a sea of the GTL crowd.

3. Her new single, "Judas", is A-MAZ-ING. I was a little worried about the direction she was heading after "Born This Way" was released (don't ask me to say 'dropped', as I never will). I'll be honest, yeah, it's an anthem...put your damn hands up...but I'm not a fan. Now "Judas"? My girl is BACK! So far it hasn't shown it's face on any current set lists but a girl can hope-n-pray-n-make deals with the Devil, am I right?

And speaking of the Devil...

Dear Jehovah's Witnesses and religious fruitcakes,

Don't come to our door. Don't leave your little pamphlets. You're only asking to get a ear full, rather than give one. So just take your little, suited selves and walk right past the big gray house with the lava rocks. There's nothing for you in there, I guarantee. And you have nothing we want. We square?


Judas. Juda-a-a.
Judas. Juda-a-a.
Judas. Juda-a-a.
Judas. GAGA.

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Thinking the point was keep what's mine for me.

Note THIS and note it NOW:

1. When we go to NYC, Coney Island will be open for the season! I've wanted to go to Coney Island my entire life. Sure, I may not be able to ride their rickety, creeptastic carnival-style rides in my preggo state-of-being, but there's NOTHING that says I can't run away with the world-famous Side Show! Take any freak show talent...sword swallowing, fire breathing, and so on...and have it done by a pregnant girl? You got GOLD right there!

2. I think I'll be wrapping up my little Babymoon getaway by seeing my girlfriend herself, Lady Gaga in Cleveland once again, but this time with my wife, the lovely Phoebe. Still working on getting tickets that are in the right place for the right price. Hopefully we can secure those today. I was told Spencer would come out weird and webbed-toed if I watched anymore Glee (it was an ACCIDENT and I only watched 5 horrific minutes) but I am certain he'll come out weird and webbed-toed after the glory that is Gaga.

And now some random blather to wrap your minds around:

A) Is Luthor Vandross dead or did he just stroke out a bunch of times? This is going to bother me and I could probably just Google it...but I won't. So if you know, tell me. What is the physical state of Luthor Vandross.

B) Todd told me that all the excess whistling at the end of "Sitting On The Dock of the Bay" was just filler because Otis Redding had died before it was finished. I HATE whistling, I HATE that song and now, I hate YOU, Otis Redding.

C) Todd also thinks that Roy Orbison is a jerk, which I don't understand. We were listening to the Malt Shop Oldies channel and some song came on and he said, "Uuuuuuuugh, is this that JERK?!". Say whaaaaaat?

D) I think Melt is overrated. I've been there a handful of times and yeah, I've had fun (and I thought about getting a sandwich tattoo but only because I like ham sandwiches) but I don't understand why everyone drenches their panties over it they way they do. Sorry, Cleveland. I probably just made some major enemies.

E) How much make-up do you think I could scrape off Gwen Stefani's face? I'm thinking a lot. I'm going to be sure to wash her face clean before I punch it. She is on my list, after all. Make sure your face is clean now. Can't have no dirty dead.

F) I love you, Mariska Hargitay.

G) They are installing a 15-ton capacity crane at my work and they are installing it WITH a crane. I am totally fascinated by this thing. I wish I could describe it because, yeah, it's a big crane. But it's a BIG CRANE and I will be able to see if every day from my office. I named it Calibos (from the Harry Hamlin "Clash Of The Titans"...not that remake bullshit) because Conrad was rejected. I love the crane. It's fascinating my brain.

H) I need some new blogs to read. It's my morning ritual. Some people read the paper, I read blogs. And lots of my favorites blog few and far-between or have stopped altogether. So spill it. I don't need anything dramatic or poetic, just entertaining. Help a sistah out.

And with that...

Monday, April 11, 2011

Vague sketch of a fantasy laughing at the sunrise like he's been up all night.

A fantastic weekend came to a close and the work week began with me cruising to work with the windows rolled down and the radio blasting total jams from the 50s and 60s. I think it was the right way to keep the good days a'coming. As the Violent Femmes sang, "Good feeling...can't you stay with me just a little longer?".

As previously mentioned, we unexpectedly got some good news that is just letting us be able to breathe and relax (I didn't even know we were holding our breath until we got this news). It just reminded me that we are uber-lucky and uber-fortunate and no doubt have a fanastic life ahead of us. It's so easy to lose sight of how good you've got it when you let stress creep in, ya know? No matter what it is, everything works out one way or another so you might as well just enjoy life! And no, I haven't turned hippie on you.

So after being kicked off in the right direction, my weekend continued full of laid-back awesomeness. I had lunch with John Jackson), hung with my parents, and had plenty of quality time with a husband I'm bananas about, finishing up our living/dining room project and watching Harry Potter movies and Sunday night cartoons. The weather didn't hurt anything either! Ah flip-flops, I missed you, old friends.

Life is good. You don't need to tell me twice. Hope it's good for you, too.

10 days until our NYC adventure.
45 days until the 3rd trimester.
76 days until Spencer's baby shower.
129 days until we're scheduled to have a baby.

Saturday, April 09, 2011

Running like a fox to keep up with me.

2 weeks from today, we'll be waking up in New York City! Our hotel has a view of the Statue and we're a block away from where the WTC was. Can't wait. Roadtrips = yum!

Chelsea Handler is weathered. I read the other day that she's only 35 and I almost fell off my chair. She's comedic but her face is a horror show. She's leathery and orange. I discriminate against the orange. I'm not going to lie.

I've been listening to Duran Duran's "Rio" album on a fairly constant basis lately. I recommend it to all. Lyrical geniuses.

We got some really good news out of the blue yesterday, which is the best kind of good news, in my opinion. I was reminded how lucky we are.

Todd told me that he thinks of me where he hears "She's a Beauty (One In a Million Girls)" by The Tubes. I hate that song but the sentiment was sweet. I'll probably start listening to it in a different way now.

Just woke up from a dream that I was in labor. All laboring moms were wearing hockey jerseys but I hadn't gotten mine yet. I hope I got the Penguins or Sharks, of course.

I think I use the phrase "slash her throat" or "slash their throats" too often. For whatever creepy reason, I like how it sounds.

We have a movie date tomorrow to either see Arthur or Your Highness. I don't expect either to blow my mind but I also don't expect either to rot as hardcore as that Hop nightmare the kid and I saw on Tuesday. Regardless, I lurve the movie theater hardcore! But if it's ad nice as the say weather-wise...maybe the zoo? I expect a great Sunday indeed.

Boots! Reveal yourself!

OK, time to start the day off going back to sleep for a little while. Hey, I work hard while simultaneously growing a young man in my guts. I've earned the right to be lazy!!!

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Tuesday, April 05, 2011

I think that people are the greatest fun!

I am obsessed with menus and knowing what people eat when they go out to lunch and dinner (breakfast can pretty much eat dirt). If anyone says, "Oh, I went to such and such restaurant last night" and doesn't tell me what they ate, I go apeshit bananas. I have to read menus online, even if I won't be dining there. Blue Pointe Grill and Metro are my most recent menu-stalks.  Just wanted to fascinate you right off the bat with one of my many quirks.

Doc appt today. Details, if there are any, later at 1313 Mockingbird Lane.

In the 5 year battle of  spring-mounted dashboard ninja that kicks vs.  spring-mounted dashboard ninja that punches, punchy has come out victorious, sending his opponent into the windshield. I thought it was going t o be the kicker all along but what do I know? I know it's time for new dashboard entertainment.

Even though "they" say it's a common symptom of pregnancy, I'm blaming all my recent intense dreams on watching too much Law and Order: SVU. That's probably not the best bedtime programming selection. What's horribly boring that I can watch which will lead to quality, dreamless sleep? That would be aces right about now. My brain needs a break.

Time to be productive. Time to be awesome.

Saturday, April 02, 2011

So many stormy nights. So many wrong or rights.

Is it really April? Is this year really zooming by while I feel like I'm standing still, using some fancy video tricks? I'll take the speediness and insanity because then Spencer (and flip-flop weather) will be here sooner...but I don't want RETIREMENT to be here sooner, ya know?

Regardless, welcome April.

I'm laying in bed, slothing it up, trying to conserve every ounce of energy for Memphis Morticians tonight (which my peanut sized brain thought was LAST night). I'm debating going to Cinema Wasteland to get some horror swag for the little man but trying to do both AND get this living/dining room painted AND cleaning Grayskull for a taco fiesta on Sunday will bury me. Ah, the joys of sharing all your energy with an ever-growing parasite! Guess I have to be selective. What will be the most fun??? Fun is where it's at. Fun is where it has always been.

Speaking of fun, after some debate, it looks like our baby shower will be at the 100th Bomb Group/Bomber's Squadron/whatever you want to call it, some time in June. I dig that place and I can't wait to see my girlfriends in one place at one time. I miss all those sexy sleazeballs. Now to register...what the Hell do I need to raise a baby??? Besides patience, alcohol, and a plethora of facial expressions?

Time to put a hurting on a box of Lucky Charms.