Monday, November 29, 2010

I wish I could carry your smile in my heart for times when my life seems so low.

Sex and the City 2 was the most embarrassing movie I've ever watched. More so than Boy In the Plastic Bubble with John Travolta. I watched it alone and was still humiliated. Those ladies are getting too old for their shenanigans. They were probably too old years ago. Man, who do I call to get those hours of my life back?

And while we're at it, I want my long weekend back, too.

Turkey Day was a great success since I met my goal of  eating too much gravy and feeling uber-slothlike. The move from chair to couch took almost all my effort. It was good to spend time with my extended family, but it never fails that I leave family functions feelings semi-lousy.

On Black Friday, after a very positive phone call from my doc, we packed up the car and took the kid and a pal to a resort in the Pennsylvania Mountains. There were a lot of issues there and they'll be getting a pretty strongly worded letter from us. But the kids didn't notice anything so in their eyes, it was a boatload of fun.

Not so fun? Having to pull over twice on the way home Saturday to toss my cookies at the Travel Plaza and Sheetz, respectively. Haven't gotten car sick in a while (Todd thinks I'm preggo but I'm not putting any money on that). It really wrecked Cookie Day, a family tradition. Every time I thought I felt better, I bottomed out again. And my feelings took a few hits that day but I don't want to talk about that. SHOCKING! After getting home from my parents house, my guts emptied out and I was down for the count. A little 30 Rock with Todd and bed. We'll mark that day "a wash".

Yesterday was another wash even though I did get to have crepes for breakfast. The dudes went to the Browns game so I was on my own. Bought an X-Mas tree that turned out to be ridiculous so it's getting returned, but managed to get some other nonsense to make the house look festive. Got that swishy carsick feeling again (while driving, which is odd but happens because my body is an anomoly) and parked it on the couch. Sex and the City 2 (thumbs down) and The Back-Up Plan (thumbs up) helped numb my brain.

Numbed it right into a coma.

And now it's time to get in the holiday spirit. First X-Mas in our new home. I hope I can dig deep into my rotten soul and get into it, because I WANT to be into it, I do. I just have to find a way to get there this year. It'll happen. I have faith. I don't have an X-Mas tree, but I have faith!

Thursday, November 25, 2010

While we were sleeping, I tried to say...

Gobble gobble!!!

I started my holiday off with pumpkin roll, a glass of milk, and 2 Thanksgiving episodes of Top Chef. Not bad a bad way to start the day! Got me to thinkin'. I'm sure I could have made a list that would have wrapped all the way around the world of things that I am thankful for. However, I have to get ready to stuff my face full of yummy goodness so...most of all...I am thankful...

...for my husband, the love of my life. Some days I want to bite his face off because he makes me bananas. But more often, I want to smooch his sweet face and block out the world so it's just him and me. Todd & Lacey vs. The World. I can't imagine my life without him.

...I'm part of my family. I think we're indestructible.

...I have pals like the Ol' Kentucky Sharks. My how we have grown over the years. Husbands, wives, weddings, engagements, babies. But deep down, still the same Ol' Sharks. Fun-loving, supportive, entertaining and amazing individuals.

...that 2010 is almost over. It's been mind-numbing.

...to have my job. Not just because I am employed (at a place that lets me have a pretty cool lifestyle) but because I truly do love my job. By working for my father, I've gotten to see different sides of him and I support his vision 100%. Anyone would be lucky to have a boss like him. Working there has helped me grow.

...for blogging. It's been waaaaay cheaper than therapy! And even if no one read my blather, I'd still keep clacking away at the keys. I have an emotional record of my life over the last 10 years. I can step right back into those moments of my life. It's a precious opportunity.

...that I get unconditional love from my fur-kids. If I'm at my best or at my worst, they don't care. They're just sweet 24 hours a day. Sweet and dumb, but aren't we all?

...for television, movies, music, magazines. Maybe some people think these things are a waste of time but they bring me so much joy. Always have, always will. I find them all to be so inspiring. They make my imagination thrive. The world is fascinating...the world of entertainment is just MORE entertaining. Adventure Time with Finn and Jake has changed my life.

...we are making a home at Castle Grayskull. Together.

...that I have remained myself over the years. And my friends, family, husband, step-son, and fur-kids all appreciate me for being me. No one expects me to be someone else or anything else. They accept me, quirks and all. I am very lucky.

And very thankful. HAPPY TURKEY DAY!!!!!

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Well now, do you feel a little better? Lift up your head and walk away.

Are we finally catching a break? Could it be true??

Well, we received good news on one of our fronts so far. Really good news! But there's no time to really enjoy it because we're still waiting for word on a few other things. But it will all come soon enough and no matter what the outcome, at least I'll be able to breathe over the long weekend.

We've had so many rad people cheering us on and sending the good vibes our way about everything that's going on in our lives right now. I can't tell you how much it means to be surrounded by such cool people. I hope we're been there for our dudes when they've needed us. I like to think we can be counted on.

But if it's not too much to ask, keep sending the vibes.

In non-stressful situation news...

Today is Johnny Switchblade's last day as a swinging bachelor. Am I sad that I'm not going to be there to witness the event that neither he nor I ever thought would happen? Yeah. I'm a little upset.

...

Maybe more than a LITTLE upset, but what can you do? I think I'm just a little salty because who doesn't think they're going to be there when their best friend ties the knot? He was a groomsman in my wedding...but that was MY wedding. I hope I'll at least see some pictures some day. I'll hang a picture of him as a groom right next to a picture of him dressed a priest. It'll be like Johnny's costumes over the years.

Ooh! A big congrats to Carol The Shoe for landing a J-O-B!!! CHEERS!!! Hopefully the good news keeps a-comin' and we can celebrate everyone's engagments, pregnancies, jobs, weddings, what-have-you at the Thansgiving Eve Train Wreck tomorrow night! Gotta embrace the one awesome period in this backwards year, am I right??

Alright day, let's get started, shall we?

Monday, November 22, 2010

Baby, when it's love if it ain't rough it isn't fun!

Man,  I don't have $9 extra bones to get the Lady Gaga limited edition tee on Tee Fury. And I love it, of course. Damn forcing myself to be responsible with money at Christmas time! Grrrr.

And congratulations, Jimmie Johnson. 5 years in a row. You've made history once again. People were cheering against you and hoping someone else would get a turn. But hey, you're the best and you did it. I'm proud of you. See you in February.

But let's start with the truly important news...

My little sis and Karl are engaged!! That's right, Evan! Mommy and Daddy are getting married and I. CAN'T. WAIT. I love you guys and couldn't be happier for you. If I could do backflips, I would, but that would be dangerous for everyone. So CONGRATS, Jenny Penny. You're going to make a bootiful bride!

For real...something has to be in the water. Lurve is EVERYWHERE!

I really have no other news, though we expect news from a few different (and muy importante) sources this week. Jesus, Buddah, Zeus, Satan, Mother Earth...whoever you pray to, maybe you could send some positive vibes our way. I could certainly tolerant some raddness this week.

And turkey. I could stand some turkey!

So a short week is followed by a long weekend that will have us tubing in Pennsylvania. I, personally, won't be tubing because I don't like when snow touches me. But I'll be there and I'll be loving it. Especially since there will be fireworks and a holiday lighting ceremony. I'm a sucker for things that sparkle and explode! And a mini-road trip with my little family is something to be thankful for.

I'm thankful that I spent a majority of my weekend in pajamas on the couch watching Big Bang Theory and 30 Rock with my husband. Some one-on-one time was needed for sure. Gotta be thankful for the low-key little things. The blah days. Be thankful for the blah days...cause at least you're head isn't falling off.

I'm thankful for all you guys. Cause you're witty and hot.

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Gonna reconstruct your self-worth brick-by-emotional-brick!

Not only is it deep into autumn, but it's practically WINTER and Katy Perry is STILL torturing me with "California Girls" every hour on the hour. I'm as sick as a homeless dog and that ridiculous and repetitive noise she makes might just be the thing that catapults me over the edge. Punching babies and kicking dogs over here.

Yep, still feeling like garbage but the world doesn't stop a-turnin' for the flu. And I got a mini-pep talk from Phoebe so the little black raincloud I was under isn't so mammoth. I can't let being physically ill affect my mental marbles. I have much more important things to feel enraged about...this means YOU, Katy Perry! So I just have to kick it. There are no other options. Ignore it or kick it. In the words of Finn the Human...

Is this really my life?
Is this how my story ends?
Bein' in this body
Seems like a battle that I cannot win.

 Maybe I should lay my head down slow
And sleep till it's all OVER.
Is this the end
of a hero boy named Finn?

HECK NO, darn it no!
This isn't how I go!
I'm gonna kill it!
I'm gonna kick life's butt.
I'm in it, to win it!

I'm gonna take life's name
And spit on it, and kick it!
LIFE CAN JUST GO EAT IT!
Cause this is a man's game!

I'm not gonna let you lie here, and waste away!
You better get up, or I'll kick you up!
TODAY'S THE DAY.

And I'm not gonna be COOL
Cause I'm pipin' HOT!
GET UP! GET UP!
I'm not gonna let you ROT.

GET UP, ALL OF YOU MAKE ME SICK.
I'll fix you with MY KICKS!
Gonna reconstruct your self-worth
Brick BY EMOTIONAL BRICK.
 
You know, after singing that, I feel 1% better.
 
Thanks Finn.
 
Thanks Phoebe.

Monday, November 15, 2010

They say you're getting better but you don't feel any better.

Everything aches from the inside out. I'm sick but what else is new? This battle with my body doesn't get any easier, even now that I know what's kicking my immune system to the floor. It's getting harder and harder to just push through. I feel like a failure for getting sick. And this is NOTHING compared to what other people I know are going through.

"I've never met anyone more prone to life-threatening idiocy than you" - Alice Cullen


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Tuesday, November 09, 2010

I just can't live without you. I'd miss everything about you.

Ol' Kentucky weddings and babies as far as they eye can see. It's official. Love is in the Cleveland...and surrounding areas...air! If you don't watch out, you might catch it!

April and Dennis done got hitched on the sly. HOORAY!

That's some pretty awesome news right there and I've been told that a ceremony and reception will follow at some point. I'm glad to hear that because this is something to celebrate and I want to be a part of it! They are two rad folks...with the CUTEST baby girl on the PLANET, I could seriously eat her face off...and deserve all the happiness they can get their hands on.

Is now the time to forgive Dennis for convincing me his middle name is "Ace"?

Which I believed. Openly. FOR YEARS.

...

Maybe I'm not ready to let that go just yet.  Still, congratulations Bells!

Monday, November 08, 2010

If I get through this part, will the next one be the same?

Punching babies, kicking dogs. Round up your children. Protect yer pets.

Might as well lay it right out on the table that the possible weird news that I thought turned out to be normal news is back to being weird and somewhat mind-numbing. Once again, we'll know more in a few weeks. Patience is a virtue, it's just not one of mine so...yeah. Awesome. Then pile on top of THAT some other rotten news that I wasn't expecting and didn't want to hear (not my news to tell but affects me and will hopefully end up being nothing) and I'm just all kinds of sucko over here.

Todd's come down with some gross sickness that I'm trying to avoid at all costs but will no doubt knock my legs out from under me. It's inevitable.  I've been informed that I don't have to visit his grave if it's raining (courteous since I don't like being in wet clothes) so it must be pretty rough. I'm super looking forward to catching it and adding to my melancholy.

We missed the engagement bonfire and the baby shower and even though he made it to the game (18th row tickets for his birthday from his wiiiiiife), he spent all night tossing his cookies and dealing with the worst headache of his life. Things are currently NOT awesome. That was a pretty awesome run-on sentence up top there though. Leave it to me to ramble my stress away.

Rot.

Today is the 115th anniversary of the X-Ray. We're old friends.

I see some retail therapy in my future, thanks to my mother. Cardigans and dresses and boots, oh my! H&M isn't going to know what hit it!! I'm shaking up the way I dress because dressing scummy makes me feel scummy any more. I need to put a little pep-in-my-step and shake things up. Sure, I'm not fond of all the exfoliating and plucking and shaving and waxing and ironing and laundering and primping it takes to look put-together and sassy...but maybe good outsides will create good insides. 60s Mod-ish is a good look for me, I think. No more dressing like a teenage boy unless I'm painting.

Maybe I should just have a New Year's Eve party and end 2010 earlier...


Tuesday, November 02, 2010

Never worry. Never be sad.

I'm good at birthdays.  I don't think that's vain to say. It's not like I said I'm pretty. I do my best to knock socks straight off when it comes to the birthdays of those closest to my black-n-bloody heart. Probably because I love my own birthday so much. Come on and celebrate me by being awesome and doing awesome stuff, am I right? OK, that might have been a little vain.

I sort of got my head stuck in a honey jar with Todd's birthday this year and it's right around the corner. I couldn't come up with anything that felt right. Sure, I got a few things together but nothing of sock-knocking proportions. Until today, that is! I worked it out (THANKS Craigslist!) and I can't wait to see the look on his puss. Trying to hold out but it's hard when he's the person I tell everything to!

Keep the secret. Keep the secret. Keep the secret.

Changing the subject I internally combust...

What's the news? News I thought was bad news wasn't. It was normal news. I'll take normal news any day. And I thought I'd take anything over that "California Girls" nonsense but with the change of seasons came "Teenage Dream" and I'm just as annoyed as I was all summer. Way to go, Katy Perry.

When listing the married, engaged, and expecting, I forgot Switchblade. Oops.

I'll be honest. I'm not voting. I vote for president but that's as far as I extend myself. I know it's my civic duty. I was all pro-voting and wacky about government in high school. But I am so anti-these campaign commercials that have been plauging my precious tube that I'm boycotting. Take that and shove it, politics!

Adventure Ben (a.k.a The Drink) was injured in some freak motorbike (not sure if that's the same as a motorcycle or if it's some sort of Thai moped or what) accident near Burma. He looks pretty awesome in his foreign hospital gown all stitched up and bruised. Regardless of his radical injuries, I'm glad he's OK. And I'm glad I got a postcard before he got all wrecked and loopy. Get well soon, man!

End transmission.

Monday, November 01, 2010

I don't need anybody's help to rise above it.

I am still pulling spirit gum off my ears. Halloween was a success.

A success in many ways it seems because Wolfboy Slim and Little Erin got engaged last night (same night I got engaged 2 short years ago)!!! A message I received simply read "FINALLY!!!!" and I knew what had gone down...and I also almost fell out of my bed!! I could not possibly be more excited for her and wish I could have seen the look on her face! Congrats, y'all! This is hardcore awesome news.

Love is in the air, man. Jimbo and Jess had their Halloween reception on Saturday, Jenn Terror got hitched yesterday, Jackie and Jocephus got engaged recently and their plans are rolling along, and now Erin and Josh join the pack. Plus Evan turned 1 and the baby shower for Vincent is around the corner. This is all good stuff. Totally the kind of awesomeness we need to balance out the disaster of a year. I'm pumped for everyone. Truly.

We went as Big Red Riding Hood and the Little Bad Wolf. I loved it.

So Halloween is over for another year but the start of holiday season is here. Turkey Day, Christmas Eve, Anti-X-Mas, New Year's festivities. I'm hoping the holidays continue to rock so we can end 2010 on a high note. I'm also hoping that some news we got isn't really as bad as my swirling brain is making it out to be. Trying to stay positive which is not always the easiest thing. Luckily I'll know more today. Le sigh.