Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Foolishness came by and we're downtown.

Still no time to write. Enjoying week 2 of the Honeymoon. Drinking on our couch and watching "My Name Is Earl" season 4 after a night of Sushi Rock with the Schuliens. This week there have been home improvements, matching tattoos, margarita machine madness with the Duttons, Olive Garden, spending cash, and much more to come!

I have not abandon you! I'm just enjoying life!

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Your lips belong to me!

I'm married! I have been for a week as of today!

I promise to fill you in on the details of the wedding weekend and honeymoon. It's just a LOT right now. And I'm still ON my honeymoon for another 11 days. I just wanted to say HEY! And to let you know that I will document everything as soon as I can. But for now...I just want to be a wife.

There are self taken and friend taken photos on Facebook. Honeymoon pics, too. The professional photo business comes later. Just use those to wet your pallet!

I'm a WIFE! Weeeeeeee!!!

Monday, September 14, 2009

Oooooh, you make me live!

I forgot how much I loved the zoo until I was there. And being there with Phoebe, a person who hates most things, made it even more entertaining. This doesn't make me a wuss or anything but...animals are SUPER cute. MOST animals. Not birds, even if they're considered majestic. And robotic dinosaurs are scary. Really scary. In the event of Lacey vs. Dinosaurs, dinosaurs would win. For sure. Because my heart would explode in my chest upon seeing one, as it almost did when Phoebe and I were alone in a creepy part of the zoo gawking at a giant robotic T-Rex. I became uncomfortable. I clearly have no survivial skills. Regardless, I love the zoo and Phoebe for taking me. Sadly, my pictures were lost so I have nothing to show off. Maybe she can hook me up with some.

I'm getting married this week. Bananas.

I guess I don't really have much to say. I have so much to do to get ready for this weekend and then 2 weeks of honeymooning that my mind is really clogged. I thought blathering here would help me empty a little bit so I could get organized. But I think it's too crowded up there to even blog properly. I am looking forward to the wedding and the reception. I AM. I don't want to say "I can't wait until it's over". But I am TRULY looking forward to the honeymoon. I don't have to plan anything. I don't HAVE to do ANYTHING. I can just turn my brain OFF and coast. I just want to coast.

Wednesday, September 09, 2009

I know exactly what you want.

We're getting married in 10 days and not only am I still sick but I feel like I may be getting WORSE. I'm feeling exactly how I felt when this whole monstrosity of an illness began. Maybe it's my fault for not going to a doctor but who can afford that? I certainly can't with all the wedding related stuff I've shelled out scratch for over the past few weeks. And I can't go to the doctor every time I have the sniffles. But who knew these sniffles/cough would last 9 days and counting? This is the pits, man. At least I'm sleeping through the night. Then again, I'm spitting into a garbage can. So they probably cancel each other out.

I'm not a happy camper today.

My bachelorette party is in 3 days. That's something to look forward to. Put a little pep in my step. Phoebe is taking me to the zoo, weather permitting, which is awesome because I haven't been there since...probably the last time I went with Phoebe. Then I guess we're going to dinner somewhere. I've been instructed to be hungry, be comfortable, and be adorable. I can cover all of those things I think. Those are the kinds of demands I like! Then it's off to the all-chick shin-dig, followed by the co-ed shindig. It's going to be a long day, a long night, and I really can't wait. If I die before then, it would really be a shame.

I started getting all philosophical and introspective, I guess. I erased it. Fuck that noise. Sitting around, getting deep, is really only going to put me in a worse mood. And being in a worse mood is not going to help my health improve in the next 10 days. I'm probably being punished for making fun of yoga. And I am certain I will be punished for plotting to destroy a cricket that is somewhere close to where I am. I can't find it but when I do, it's stoppin' time. I get stomped on enough already so it won't be anything new. Silencing this cricket forever will be worth it. Now where are you hiding, my pet??

Saturday, September 05, 2009

All I did was about you.

HELLO 500th POST! Damn, you're stunning.

500 posts. Amazing. People might say it's a giant time suck but I have YEARS...probably THEE most important years...of my life documented. The highs, the lows, the living. It's all documented. I can relive it all if I want to. I can read ANYTHING and remember exactly how I felt at any given moment in time. Sometimes I can even remember what I was wearing. I've just jam-packed a lot into 30 years. For example...

College, the first man (and alcoholic) I ever lived with, losing my tonsils, losing my appendix, losing my wisdom teeth, losing friends, eloping, graduating, getting divorced, becoming a Pussyfoot Girl, my first real job with a salary and benefits, befriending many of the Ol' Kentucky Sharks, owning my 1st home, the 2nd alcoholic to ravage my life-n-brain, a better "real" job with a pay raise and better benefits, meeting my match, the hospital horrors of 9/2008, getting engaged, and all the shows, parties, travels, adventures, awesomeness, heartache, and pain that have filled in the gaps.

I have lived. No one can tell me otherwise.

So to celebrate the 500th post of random bathering and babbling and what have you, I'm stealing something from Hot Trash that she stole from someone else. I can't remember what number of random facts about myself I'm suppose to list and since 500 seems like a challenge right now, I'm going to go with 30 to celebrate 30 years of living...and run-on sentences. And I'd bet cash money that somewhere in this blog (of the 2 that came before it), I'm already spewed all of these facts. Enjoy...or don't.

30 Random Facts About Moi

1. I am the only person I know who walked out of "Fight Club". It was 10 minutes before it was over and I couldn't take anymore. Little did I know that they'd play "Where Is My Mind?" in the last 10 minutes.

2. My dentist said I have the oddest bicuspids he's ever seen.

3. I had a dream about tap dancing with Christopher Walken to "Walk Right Back" by The Everly Brothers every night for a year. I still have it from time to time.

4. I was a bleach blonde for EXACTLY 1 day.

5. My original PFG name, Sassy Sourpuss, was inspired by an imaginary girlfriend my young nephew had. She was shaped like a triangle, had yellow hair, and was mean. Sometimes her mom was pregnant and sometimes she wasn't.

6. I changed my major in college 7 times, finally graduated, and am thinking of going back to nursing school.

7. I've been in several bands that didn't make it past the 1st practice: Animal 19, Plastic Surgery A-Go-Go, Cadaver Dogs, The Battered Wives, The Buddy Hollycaust, Virginia Slim & The Nicorettes...the list goes on and on.

8. While they are my favorite animal (and I have tattoos of 2 different types...Hammerhead & Great White), I am TERRIFIED of sharks. And I'm even MORE TERRIFIED of crabs (while we're on the topic of sea life).

9. My lucky numbers are 17 and 36 because I won awesome prizes at the St. Charles carnival playing those numbers in my youth.

10. I am allergic to kiwi...which means I could ALSO be allergic to latex but I'm not.

11. I hated my name when I was younger (I know 1 other Lacey and I'm a decade older) and vowed to change my name to Mary. At this point in my life, I have come to realize that my kids will not have average names.

12. I have never once in my life thought I had anything to prove to anyone. Even myself.

13. Seeing teeth out of the mouth makes my physically sick. There will be no "Tooth Fairy" for my kids. And I bet they'll grow up just fine.

14. I was once so dehydrated after surgery that the hospital used an absurdly high gauged needle to "open me up" and rehydrate me. Once they took the needle out, blood started pouring. They had a hard time stopping the bleeding. I looked like I had been shot.

15. I never wanted to have my braces taken off. I loved them.

16. At movie theaters, I put a hadful of butter popcorn and about 5 Snow Caps in my mouth at the same time. It's never the same at home.

17. Music is my FAVORITE thing and has been a gigantic part of my life. One year I saw over 100 DIFFERENT bands live. I can listen to "Mr. Brightside" by The Killers over and over without getting sick of it. Seeing The Breeders with Johnny was was one of the best times I've ever had. Lionel Richie is the only artist I NEVER skip on my Ipod. I first saw Todd at a show, we first talked at a show, our first date was a show, he proposed the night of LOTH's last show. I LOVE MUSIC!!!

18. If there is glass on the ground, I WILL step on it in bare feet. It's my curse.

19. I only truly regreat losing 1 friend but I sometimes wonder why she ever liked me anyway. I think I made her laugh. I'd love to make her laugh again but that's never going to happen. Some of the best times of my life were with her.

20. I got 104% in my Sexual Psychology class in college. I did my final project on fetishes using my copies of Bizarre Mag, the BEST magazine on the planet.

21. I DESPISE root beer and Fritos. I'd rather go thirsty and starve.

22. When someone says "go to your happy place", or some other bullshit like that, I think of Disney World, Las Vegas, and Niagara Falls. I guess those are my happy places.

23. I had really bad insomnia in college and at one point, I only slept 2 hours a night for almost a month.

24. I have Johnny's name tattooed over a switchblade with "Best Friends" necklaces, Todd's name tattooed in a bubble being shot out of a robot in pajama's bubble gun, and I'm getting Jen's name tattooed on a meat cleaver covered in cherry blossoms.

25. I have an extra bone in each of my feet. It's genetic. My mom and sisters also have the extra bone.

26. I want ALL of my organs removed after I die so there is ZERO possibility that I can be buried alive. I would also like to be buried in my Lost Sounds shirt.

27. I have seen "Steel Magnolias" probably...200 times, if not more. I can recite it word for word and sometimes I still cry when they take Shelby off the machines.

28. I am obsessed with the 5 Pointed Star of Easy Listening: Chicago, Hall & Oates, Huey Lewis and The News, Journey, Air Supply. I truly love every single jam by each of these bands. A song by 3 of them will play at our wedding reception!

29. I've been to the Bahamas twice and thought it was filthy and boring.

30. I spent a great deal of time in my youth dressed like Snow White. I had the record that actually had pictures on the vinyl. I played it over and over and over. I would act out the death scene for my grandma and still eat the apple, even in death. She found it disturbing.

VIVA 500!

Wednesday, September 02, 2009

Open up and let it flow.

Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! The skunk is SICK!

I have my fingers, toes, arms, legs, eyeballs and labia crossed that because I'm sick NOW, I won't be sick for the wedding. Seeing as I am ALWAYS sick...I'm looking at this cold that's taken over as a blessing. If I didn't get sick now, I might be sick then. All the same, sneezing and stufiness can suck it. Todd was an excellent nurse yesterday. Mac-n-Cheese, meds, fluids (could be dirty but isn't), back rubs, blankets, snuggles. He didn't wear my nurse costume but that's muscles were too sore to laugh any way.

I know I got sick because I'm stressed and my immune system took a vacation from Stress City. Some wedding stuff regarding the reception has become quite the cluster-fuck and NONE of it was our fault. But of course, we get to figure it out. Ridiculous. I don't have time to have a brain tornado concerning reception details 17 days before we swap vows. Todd is as angry as I am so he's taking the reigns in this situation. He promised he'd fix it and I know he will. My pops is all ready to step in and set people straight if need be. It's good that I have those 2 dudes because if it weren't for them ready to handle business, I'd be ripping people's heads off like a wolverine on a bad day.

So what else is going on in life?

The weekend was pretty low key because Todd wasn't feeling up to snuff. We hit PJ Thursday with I missed that guy. Friday we had drinks with the photographers and sealed the deal on locations and stuff (those pics are going to blow minds, I can guarantee). Friday night was when Todd started feeling icky so we were in bed mighty early. Saturday I met the chicks in my fam for lunch and then spent the majority of the day alone while Todd slept off his illness. I was slightly bored. Todd said he bet that would happen after the art show closed up and he was right. Though when Shelby was mysteriously missing from the yard...that spiced up the night. She's home now...and she is grounded. I missed the cocktail party which burns my toast because I was looking forward to it. But Todd was down for the count so...sigh.

Sunday we got a lot of wedding junk done. But that's on the wedding blog.

Oh! I did collect my money and remaining paintings from the gallery. It was nice to have a big chunk of change. I financed a date with some of it and went to see Inglorious Basterds after a sub-par dinner and drinks. The awesomeness of the movie made up for the meal. It was mind blowing. Really. Go see it. Twice. Anyway, I trimmed the prices of all the paintings and posted them on Facebook. I should probably do it on My Space, too, but I'm over that. Maybe I'm growing up. Maybe I'll post them here. Everything must go!! Except "Nasty Naughty Nurses 3". Todd claimed that as his own.

This weekend is wide open. Filled with possibilities.

My fortune cookie reads: Find release from your cares. Have a good time.