Saturday, September 05, 2009

All I did was about you.

HELLO 500th POST! Damn, you're stunning.

500 posts. Amazing. People might say it's a giant time suck but I have YEARS...probably THEE most important years...of my life documented. The highs, the lows, the living. It's all documented. I can relive it all if I want to. I can read ANYTHING and remember exactly how I felt at any given moment in time. Sometimes I can even remember what I was wearing. I've just jam-packed a lot into 30 years. For example...

College, the first man (and alcoholic) I ever lived with, losing my tonsils, losing my appendix, losing my wisdom teeth, losing friends, eloping, graduating, getting divorced, becoming a Pussyfoot Girl, my first real job with a salary and benefits, befriending many of the Ol' Kentucky Sharks, owning my 1st home, the 2nd alcoholic to ravage my life-n-brain, a better "real" job with a pay raise and better benefits, meeting my match, the hospital horrors of 9/2008, getting engaged, and all the shows, parties, travels, adventures, awesomeness, heartache, and pain that have filled in the gaps.

I have lived. No one can tell me otherwise.

So to celebrate the 500th post of random bathering and babbling and what have you, I'm stealing something from Hot Trash that she stole from someone else. I can't remember what number of random facts about myself I'm suppose to list and since 500 seems like a challenge right now, I'm going to go with 30 to celebrate 30 years of living...and run-on sentences. And I'd bet cash money that somewhere in this blog (of the 2 that came before it), I'm already spewed all of these facts. Enjoy...or don't.

30 Random Facts About Moi

1. I am the only person I know who walked out of "Fight Club". It was 10 minutes before it was over and I couldn't take anymore. Little did I know that they'd play "Where Is My Mind?" in the last 10 minutes.

2. My dentist said I have the oddest bicuspids he's ever seen.

3. I had a dream about tap dancing with Christopher Walken to "Walk Right Back" by The Everly Brothers every night for a year. I still have it from time to time.

4. I was a bleach blonde for EXACTLY 1 day.

5. My original PFG name, Sassy Sourpuss, was inspired by an imaginary girlfriend my young nephew had. She was shaped like a triangle, had yellow hair, and was mean. Sometimes her mom was pregnant and sometimes she wasn't.

6. I changed my major in college 7 times, finally graduated, and am thinking of going back to nursing school.

7. I've been in several bands that didn't make it past the 1st practice: Animal 19, Plastic Surgery A-Go-Go, Cadaver Dogs, The Battered Wives, The Buddy Hollycaust, Virginia Slim & The Nicorettes...the list goes on and on.

8. While they are my favorite animal (and I have tattoos of 2 different types...Hammerhead & Great White), I am TERRIFIED of sharks. And I'm even MORE TERRIFIED of crabs (while we're on the topic of sea life).

9. My lucky numbers are 17 and 36 because I won awesome prizes at the St. Charles carnival playing those numbers in my youth.

10. I am allergic to kiwi...which means I could ALSO be allergic to latex but I'm not.

11. I hated my name when I was younger (I know 1 other Lacey and I'm a decade older) and vowed to change my name to Mary. At this point in my life, I have come to realize that my kids will not have average names.

12. I have never once in my life thought I had anything to prove to anyone. Even myself.

13. Seeing teeth out of the mouth makes my physically sick. There will be no "Tooth Fairy" for my kids. And I bet they'll grow up just fine.

14. I was once so dehydrated after surgery that the hospital used an absurdly high gauged needle to "open me up" and rehydrate me. Once they took the needle out, blood started pouring. They had a hard time stopping the bleeding. I looked like I had been shot.

15. I never wanted to have my braces taken off. I loved them.

16. At movie theaters, I put a hadful of butter popcorn and about 5 Snow Caps in my mouth at the same time. It's never the same at home.

17. Music is my FAVORITE thing and has been a gigantic part of my life. One year I saw over 100 DIFFERENT bands live. I can listen to "Mr. Brightside" by The Killers over and over without getting sick of it. Seeing The Breeders with Johnny was was one of the best times I've ever had. Lionel Richie is the only artist I NEVER skip on my Ipod. I first saw Todd at a show, we first talked at a show, our first date was a show, he proposed the night of LOTH's last show. I LOVE MUSIC!!!

18. If there is glass on the ground, I WILL step on it in bare feet. It's my curse.

19. I only truly regreat losing 1 friend but I sometimes wonder why she ever liked me anyway. I think I made her laugh. I'd love to make her laugh again but that's never going to happen. Some of the best times of my life were with her.

20. I got 104% in my Sexual Psychology class in college. I did my final project on fetishes using my copies of Bizarre Mag, the BEST magazine on the planet.

21. I DESPISE root beer and Fritos. I'd rather go thirsty and starve.

22. When someone says "go to your happy place", or some other bullshit like that, I think of Disney World, Las Vegas, and Niagara Falls. I guess those are my happy places.

23. I had really bad insomnia in college and at one point, I only slept 2 hours a night for almost a month.

24. I have Johnny's name tattooed over a switchblade with "Best Friends" necklaces, Todd's name tattooed in a bubble being shot out of a robot in pajama's bubble gun, and I'm getting Jen's name tattooed on a meat cleaver covered in cherry blossoms.

25. I have an extra bone in each of my feet. It's genetic. My mom and sisters also have the extra bone.

26. I want ALL of my organs removed after I die so there is ZERO possibility that I can be buried alive. I would also like to be buried in my Lost Sounds shirt.

27. I have seen "Steel Magnolias" probably...200 times, if not more. I can recite it word for word and sometimes I still cry when they take Shelby off the machines.

28. I am obsessed with the 5 Pointed Star of Easy Listening: Chicago, Hall & Oates, Huey Lewis and The News, Journey, Air Supply. I truly love every single jam by each of these bands. A song by 3 of them will play at our wedding reception!

29. I've been to the Bahamas twice and thought it was filthy and boring.

30. I spent a great deal of time in my youth dressed like Snow White. I had the record that actually had pictures on the vinyl. I played it over and over and over. I would act out the death scene for my grandma and still eat the apple, even in death. She found it disturbing.

VIVA 500!

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