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Life is hard. It's always been hard. When do I get a break? When will my family get a break? When will I stop asking why this is all happening??? I hurt from the inside out. I am greatly anticipating my official transition to robot.

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Probably won't be blogging very much for awhile. Spencer made an early entrance to our lives and it turns out he needs a little extra love and attention than the average bear. It wasn't what we were expecting but he is more than I could have ever imagined. He's got me wrapped around his tiny fingers. He owns me. I'm in love. But I'm also in a great deal of pain...probably because I love him so much. Spencer and Todd are my everything. Every extra ounce of time I have is theirs, now and forever.

This doesn't mean I'm quitting the blog game. I love it too much. I just need to settle back into life after living in 2 different hospitals for 10 days. Plus maybe I'll be more interesting if I'm blogging more sporadically. Anyway, stick around.

She's just trying to fit in but it's hard when she's never spoken to anyone.

Life right now revolves around being pregnant and hopefully not being pregnant soon. My baby, my husband, my house, and making it through this last week of work...that's my life right now and I'm OK with that. In the blogosphere, I've separated the pregnant part of my life from the rest of it and at this point, there's no division. I'm anxiously waiting to bring my son into this world. That's the only event on my dance card...no Lady Lead Foot show, no Road Rash Bash, no Granger Danger. In fact, my dad has grounded me to only destinations between home and the hospital. Good looking out, dad.

I've been trying to do too much. I'm not sure why. Maybe it's part of nesting. Maybe I'm still determined to prove that I've rocked my pregnancy from beginning to end. But I'm tired now. I can only do what I can do at this point. And honestly, after today, Castle Grayskull will be in good shape and that'll be a load off my mind. I've got the whole kingdom to myself while the fellas go to the tractor pull, an event I am NOT sad to miss! I'm devoting any energy I have today to cleaning the art room. I have a feeling being a parent might be inspirational so I want to be ready.

Will I ever REALLY be ready? Probably not. Todd has been a parent for 10 years but he's never been a full time parent and he had HIS parents in the same house to help out. Spencer is going to be ours 24/7 and we're in this together. It's exciting. It's an adventure. It's also terrifying. But I'm glad I became a parent when I did. Not that there's anything wrong with breeding young. I had that option, too. I'm just glad that I've done so much... I traveled, I screwed up, I lived...selfishly. I didn't miss out on any experiences, even the painful ones. Now I can give 110% to Spencer and make sure he has the awesome life he deserves. And my experiences with him are just going to add to the awesomeness of my life. No doubt.

This is a blog about my life. And this is it.

Miles away from nowhere and the wind doesn't have a name.

SCHMOWZOW! I can officially say I'm having a baby this month!

I know this isn't the baby blog but I thought it had to be documented. A year ago at this time (I think even on this DAY), we moved into Castle Grayskull and were months into trying to breed. Now look at us? Our house is a home and we're going to have a baby THIS MONTH (even if he is the maximum 2 weeks late...which I would like to think he wouldn't do to his mama).

As a last major outting before motherhood, Todd and I met Tessa (Phoebe ended up being too under the weather to attend) at the Great Lakes Renaissance/Medieval Faire and had a rad, if not HOT, afternoon. First off, Renaissance Faire merchandise is pretty much all awesome. If I had a surplus of funds, I would have left with one of everything...especially this octopus ring that I fell in love with. I settled for what I truly wanted...a glittery ribbon crown, which I wore all day, and a dyed fox tail which put my little immitation tail from Target to SHAME. I think Dr. Nightmare thought the tail was her new boyfriend when I brought it in the house.

Besides merchandise, I loved the general feeling of the faire, being tucked back under the trees like I was in Sherwood Forest (except there were cream puffs and pizza available). I'll give them props, their selection of snacks was extensive but it was too damn hot to want to eat, though Todd did put a hurting on a turkey leg. If you're into people watching, this was the place to be. The costumes (of all people there, not just employees) were amazing. And there was no shortage of things to do and see. Dancing, comedy, demonstrations, and my favorite, the jousting.

I was proud of myself for putting in 3 hours under the baking sun. I really did have a great time, though my back got angry and my feet weren't much happier. But my good mood was quickly SMOOSHED when we got on the highway in Geneva and drove right into a traffic shit storm. It took us an hour to go 6 miles and then 10 minutes to go 1/10 of a mile. Bad News Bears. Todd said at least we were spending time together...but I was uncomfortable, exhausted, and starving. It was hard not to cry. At one point, we threw the car into park and switched seats because I was having contractions and my son was seeing how far he could stick some appeandage under my rib cage. Grrrr.

3 hours and 15 minutes later (YES, longer than the amount of time we were at the faire), we pulled into Castle Grayskull. I was in pajamas and in bed with Dr. Nightmare in 2 seconds flat. Todd made me some dinner and I fell asleep with Top Chef D.C.  Overall, I'm glad we went and I feel satisfied in my last roadtrip for awhile. We ran into Brother Ed and Natalie there and she told me about her short labor and (3 push) delivery. I hope I can channel her awesomeness on our big day! And just think, next year I can take Spencer to the faire.

HUZZAH! And let the final countdown begin!