My bad mood is officially non-existent and has gone the way of the dinosaurs. I was in a lot of pain and putting myself through mental agony so the next statement may seem insane but maybe this chaos did me good! I fixed things. I apologized. I was assured it wasn't all my fault. I said that it wouldn't happen again because I don't like to be a spazz. I explained myself, no matter how hard that is for me. And for the first time EVER in my current situation, I said EXACTLY what I wanted to say, no matter if anyone wanted to hear it or not. It felt great. It felt like eating a big stack of my dad's pancakes.
Slowly but surely, the damage was repaired. Eventhough I usually feel things are fixed if there's fooling around at work...and there was...this time, I said it wouldn't be until I was invited back into the bed that I felt things were back to normal. And I was.
Today I've had this goofy smile plastered across my mug. I knew as soon as I woke up that it would be a great day and it really has been. I've been laughing and joking and practically glowing. I just know how lucky I am that I had enough hypothetical bandages to fix the wounds I caused by my ridiculous SPAZZ-ASS-NESS. Because I've got something good. Damn good. And I'm going to take the best care of it which is what I should have been doing all along. I have something in my life that makes me excited about every single day...it inspires me...it entertains me...it keeps me warm.
So if you were worried about me...and offered to call my voice mail and sing a new song every time, reasurring me that you know PLENTY of songs...I'm alright now. I was in bad shape but I'm back and better than ever. A lot like *insert celebrity here*.
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