Some day soon it will all settle down.

It was brought to my attention that certain frequent visitors draw from my babbling the conclusion that my life is in constant turmoil. It's not true. It's in partial turmoil and partial chaos.

If I've been ranting and raving recently and not making a lot of sense (when do I ever...yeah, yeah, I hear you), please do not lable me as "gone off the deep end" or "nutty". Anyone who really knows me can make a pie chart illustrating that boys are a difficult subject for me and loving them is even worse. After all, that is what this is all about. Boys. Or one boy in particular. My track record with the penis-wearing pack isn't envy-worthy so I might possibly have my guard up, slightly, while at the same time, not registering what a "guard" is.

I have possibly not picked the boy best suited for me or most enviable or most admired. I didn't really pick him at all. I just...fell...and I haven't been this happy or this sad ever in my life. Big letters spelling EVER. Make an impact! EVER!!!

But my life is not in total turmoil. It feels good to be back in the game, living my life, even if I'm making big mistakes, doing stupid things, not thinking things through. It's better than being heartbroken and wondering how I'm going to get through life at all. I'm ready to get some cuts and bruises. I know certain people out there are worried about me and how my heart will hold up if I am disappointed by the fella I fancy. I'm curious about that myself and can't guarantee that it won't happen. But if you would have asked me if my ex-husband and I would have ever parted ways, I would have given you one tall and think middle finger. But what do I know? I know life holds no guarantees.

I'm ready to take more risks. I'm ready to stop making the obvious choice, I'm ready, and prepared, to wait my turn if a turn should, in fact, be coming my way. After all, it has been suggested that old furniture will move out and new furniture will move in.

I'm putting "girl talk" on the backburner until there's something to say that I can ACTUALLY say. From now on...you get a regular dose of my constant insanity!

Blood will hit the pavement!