All those eyes...it's an overload!

There are a lot of songs about eyeballs and eyes in general.
-20 Eyes by The Misfits
-Sad Eyes by The Ponys
-Your Baby Blue Eyes by The Johnny Burnette Trio (also covered by Stray Cats)
-Lights Out (Poke Yer Eyes Out) by Angry Samoans
-Brown Eyed Girl by Van Morrison
-Sad Eyes (Turn the Other Way) by Robert John
-Smoke Gets In Your Eyes by The Platters
-Private Eyes by my gods and yours, Hall and Oates
I could really go on and on all day but then you might be wondering why I'm all up the ass of eyeballs suddenly, especially when it's well documented that eyeballs make me nervous. A few weeks back, a guy on ER was coughing so hard, his eyeball jutted out. I screamed my flippin' wig off. They popped it back in with a paperclip, as if they had no sterile instruments in the HOSPITAL.

The whole "eyeball thing" has to do with my nephew. He's almost 16 and he rocks.

He was helping build a shed this weekend and got a nail stuck in his eye.

He pulled it out himself and insists it made a sickening pop noise. He said he could see the nail sticking right out of his cornea which prompted the plucking. They cleaned him up at the ER but it turned out his eyeball was losing fluid... he said it could have shriveled up like a grape to a raisin so I'll never be eating either of those fruits again.

This debackle wins you a few stitches in the cornea and he had to be AWAKE because he had eaten that day and they won't put you under in case you puke, choke and die during surgery. Then they'd have a law suit on their hands. Awake while they sewed up the bullseye portion of his...eye. ::shutter::

He'll be "rockin' the pirate patch" for at least a month and there may be surgery on Monday to repair a tear in his lens. This sort of puts an axe on the travelling baseball team or utilizing his temps. However, it has made room for all sorts of eyeball jokes. Yesterday, we were sitting around a table and I said, "Don't worry about the sun. It's not blinding me", to which he said, "Can we not use that word so loosely?". I also enjoyed when he offered my father help lifting a lawnmover and said, "You need a hand, Grandpa? 'Cause I can't give you an eye". I never know if he's winking at me.

His vision may wind up being 20/40 and he may some day get a cataract but for now, he's pretty much a-ok...cracking jokes, being waited on hand and foot, and most importantly, no pain or serious vision loss!! His favorite aunt will be cursed with constant nightmares about eyes being replaced with raddishes (when heavily sedated on Valium, he claimed this happened to him).

Today, he is annoyed that he can feel the stitches touching his eyelid.

Lesson learned? WEAR YOUR SAFETY GOGGLES!