Hold on, hold on, hold on to what you've got.

1. This was the first year that I missed Heavy Rebel. Some of the usual suspects were taking a year off so that was comforting. I wasn't the only dud. But then again...I missed some radness. Like Lisa being there. And Carol (Miss Firecracker One-Woman Band) playing in the jailhouse. The more I think about it all, the sadder I am. But there just wasn't money...or time. Next year...when I'm a married woman with an art show under my belt...I'll be there. And I'll have more fun than anybody else. But for now...sulking.

2. I'm going to yoga with Phoebe this week. Should be interesting. I'm already uber-flexible so I'm taking this as an opportunity to hang with Phoebe and destress. You all know I've been going bananas lately with everything that's on my plate. Even though I don't believe in all this new-age hooey, I guess it wouldn't hurt to try and "get centered" or "harness my chi" or something. Plus, anything that makes me leaner gets an A+ in my book.

3. Speaking of getting leaner...I've been fluctuating between a 9 - 15 pound weight loss. Patting myself on the back. Patting myself on the ASS! Todd noticed I had lost but didn't notice I had gained...that's how I like it. And we're both pretty fond of the way this vessel is shaping up. Now it's just time to tone. Which includes sweating and effort...which can be sucko. I think I know an activity that suits me and my purpose which Todd cvan participate in! Va-VOOM! Enough smut. Like a lot of chix, I sometimes in the past have had body image issues. Even when I was STICK THIN, it wasn't enough. This is enough. I feel really good in my skin right now. My goal to be a bad ass bride is well within reach.

4. Stemming from above...things in the "Va-VOOM" department have been extra Va-VOOMY recently. I don't want to burn your eyeballs out with the gorey and possibly illegal details...and I don't want to enduce cookie-tossing by talking about how our room smells...and it probably would do you no good (unless you need to be pushed over the edge) to talk about how sore I am...but yeah. Drink that all in! I'm smutty and I'm not afraid to admit it!

5. I saw the "New Moon" trailer for the first time and now I'm counting down the days until November. Luckily, the art show (August), wedding-n-honeymoon (September), and They Might Be Giants (October) will help the time fly. I was late to jump on the "Twilight" band wagon so I am determined to see this one in the theater at LEAST once. I've heard that Edward is absent for a portion of the book so I will use that portion of the film to use the can. My sister has Jasper as a back up. I have no back up. I'm all Edward all the time.

6. I don't care what anyone says. When "More Than a Feelin'" by Boston comes on the radio, you just HAVE to get happy. Especially if you hear it in a car on a nice day and your windows are down. I'm not a big fan of "classic rock" but that song works. So does "Cosmic Thing" by B-52s. Sure, it's totally goofy and ridiculous but I love it. You can't NOT be in a good mood when you hear that song. I love music. I miss going to shows non-stop. I hope Sasquatch lets me slap him across the face!

7. I was unsatisfied with the photos I had previously had of my paintings for "Cannibalicious!" so yesterday, I took all new pics. I posted them (on Face Space, of course) and I'm getting really good feedback. Everyone is going bananas over "Angry Breakfast"...like anyone could resist it. I think I should force the 2 highest bidders to compete for it in a luchador style wrestling match right there in the gallery. That won't happen in reality...but it will in my brain! I picked up the promo cards and will be distributing them like MAD. BEWARE!

8. Jen just told me that when they baby kicks, she can see it from the outside now. I miss her so much and I'm so pumped to meet my nephew! I've never been a big fan of other people's kids. There were random gems that I latched on to but as a whole...eh. Then Jen May had my boyfriend, Nolan. He's rad in every way and he's going to be 1 this week! ADORE that kid. And I've adored Jen's baby from the time her third preggo test and it read PREGGO! While I don't look forward to giving birth feeling like "doing the splits on a crate of dynomite", I look forward to cooking up a little monster. Soon. Sorry Phoebe. You'll be an aunt even if you ARE allergic to children.

9. I can't believe it's July 6th! This year is flying by at warp speed! I'm going to be a wife soon. REALLY soon. Not as soon as Marie, but SOON! And after that, Jen will be a mommy! This all blows my mind. If you would have asked me last year what I thought would happen THIS year...Jen becoming a parent and me becoming a wife would NOT have been on that list. I guess it's nice to still be shockable in good ways. It's the horrific shocks that my mind can't handle. But everyone I knew who was suffering last year has mended and they rock harder than ever. Thumbs up, 2009!

10. I love you.