You're a bad-hearted boy-trap, babydoll.

First blog of 2009, the year I'm getting married. Yowza.

I guess a good place to start would be with Christmas and New Years and all that jazz. But I don't wanna. Not because they weren't great. They were. Exactly what I expected and all. Chill. Low-key. Nothing mind-blowing but nothing forgettable. Nice. I am totally just throwing around really lame adjectives and descriptions right now and probably boring you to tears. Or to suicide. Your pick. Holidays were good, glad they're over, ready for my 30th birthday...moving on.

I am exhausted and have a fishbowl in my skull, no doubt. I have NOT been sleeping well and it's going on WEEKS now. Even Advil PM can't save me. The prescription junk makes me snacky and that doesn't mesh well with the 2.5 pounds I've lost so far. But I need to sleep and can't and it's making me bananas! I have zero stress-management skills so I know that isn't helping me one bit. But then there's this new annoyance in my life.

Saturday night, after battling a werid and unexpected hangover, my heart started raaaaaacing. And I began to feel really nervous. I was in a weird panic for no reason whatsoever. Even when I'm stressed, I don't get weird hardcore physical effects. This was unlike anything I've ever dealth with before. Maybe I was having an anxiety attack? I dunno. But I DO know that it happened again LAST night before bed. Same time frame. Same physical nuttiness. My heart was beating so hard that I could feel it in my ear which causes major ickiness for me. Bananas. All of it.

Not to much else to blather about. I haven't made my resolutions yet. Didn't paint as much as I wanted to during my time off but DID make some progress. Maybe passing on Heavy Rebel this year. Wedding junk. My life is a little on the dull side these days. Not DULL. I'm lovin' life. Livin' it. There is just a thread of excitement missing right now. It's all low-key. That's probably a good thing...since my heart seems to be attempting to explode in my chest.

Oh...no more stand-up comics in 2009. Woof.