Am I giving up? Giving in? Even giving a fuck anymore?
There are a lot of things I am super psyched about but before I can start jumping up and down in a fit of hyperactivity, I have to have a little pity party. Actually, pity party isn't even the right term but I don't care enough to come up with something creative and better fitting. I'm in some sort of rut recently and carrying (ha!) a lot of stress in my hands. Best way to sum it all up? I'm just not happy. Period. My best friend isn't happy so he's going to pack it all in and leave town. I don't have that option so I need to make things better where I am. Work with what I've got. And I've got potential.
A major perk (get your airplane vomit bag ready, suckahs, boyfriend mush ahead) is that everything is boss in my relationship so I have someone to lean on while my brain is being rewired. In fact, we've been on the same page about a lot of key things recently (saving some dough, cutting down on money-wasting activities, budgets-n-stuff...we're not the Rockafellers, yo) which is comforting. And we've managed to have a lot of fun (chillaxing with friends, chillaxing with each other) despite my recent emo-ness. It's goot to have a boyfriend that's a buddy. My goal is to really tighten the belt to build up some savings, improve the credit (stupid greedy exs), and start building a future for us. Not to mention that I want to get back to being a work out MACHINE! He's behind me and WITH ME 100% so I'm going to kick major ass and re-evaluate where I stand on December 31st...and that night, I will party my face off as a reward for working so hard. I think I'll start 2009 off feeling pretty good about what I've improved on.
Maybe I'm not in such a rut! I have a plan! Onward.
A close friend have MAJOR surgery yesterday and came through it with flying colors. I'm happy and relieved. And I'm also proud of how well he and his wife handled everything that was thrown at them. Total bad asses, both of them. Hopefully none of my friends or their loved ones have to go through anything like this again. Horrible. But we're celebrating! Life is good! We went out and celebrated with a few beers on a bar patio last night (I heart bar patios and might not be seeing them for awhile once my penny-pinching life-style kicks in on Monday). But BEFORE Monday hits...
It's almost time for Todd and I to blow town! About 49 hours left in the countdown. 49 hours sounds a lot more tolerable than 4 days, or a week, or a week and a half! We're hitting the road and leaving any baggage (but not LUGGAGE) and drama at home! I'm thinking of turning my celly off for most of the trip so once again, if you're planning on having a crisis or I'm your "in case of emergency" person, I will probably fail you. And you'll have to fogive me! I've been looking forward to this trip and I deserve it. WE deserve it! We work hard. We're good people. We love each other and are good to our friends and family. And starting Monday, we're going to be hermits for the rest of the year. Time to cut loose...and there's no one I'd rather get silly with.
Fuck my rut. Life is good.
1 comment:
i just figured out how to subscribe to blogger blogs thru google. so now my lazy ass doesn't have to REMEMBER to go look at yours. WOOOP! expect commentary (or comment-ery) to resume.
and what's this i hear about a best friend leaving town? wtf?!
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